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My best friend promised me a night on the town and I would love it, he said. “All you have to do is be yourself. You will have no problems meeting girls.” What I felt was out of place. First off, I was east of the Mississippi. I felt all claustrophobic. The buildings were too close together. I had talked my college buddy Steve into visiting west Texas, now it was my turn here in this tourist trap of a Florida town. I didn't give a rat's ass about those mouse ears all over the place. Putting on my boots and Stetson, I would make the best of it. I'd drink my beer and see if these people could two step.
Once we entered the club, Steve saw someone he knew and took off. I went to the bar for a beer. “Are you from Texas?” the bartender asked. She didn't look like too many bartenders I knew. Brunette, sparkling smile, gorgeous eyes and wearing a tank top about to lose a few buttons.
“Do you need to check my ID?”
She did. “You really are from Texas!”
“Why is that so hard to believe?” I wondered aloud.
“I have got to do this.” She stepped out from behind the bar to stand in front of me. Wrapping her hands around my neck and pressing those firm breasts against my chest, she gave me a deep, wet kiss. “Welcome to Florida!” She got back behind the bar and stood up on something so everyone could see her. “Hey girls! We got ourselves a cowboy over here!” she shouted at the top of her lungs.
“Are you really a cowboy?” a female voice from behind me asked. I turned around to see Steve, a girl on both sides of him. The blonde on his left stepped over to me. “Steve here tells me you ride horses to school.” Looking at Steve, I was trying to decide if I should kick his ass or not. His expression told me to play along.
“It was just that one time the truck broke down.” I lied. “You know... save a horse, ride a cowboy.” I smiled. What the hell was I thinking?
“I think I just might.” she replied.
I couldn't believe that line would work. She told me her name was Debbie. We made small talk over a few beers and decided to go back to her place. She put on some music and sat next to me on the couch. “I've always wanted a cowboy.” she admitted. “Show me how you treat girls out in Texas.”
Wrapping my arm around her shoulder, I lightly traced patterns on her shirt while giving her tender kisses. Before she knew it, my fingers had her unbuttoned blouse. She had one of those front snapping bras that came undone with three fingers. Snap! Surprise! Debbie gasped as my mouth closed on her breast.
“Now we'll just leave your dress on.” my hand traced down her leg. On the return trip, my hand slid under her skirt “But these'll have to go.” Slipping a finger under her panties, I let them slide down around her ankles.
As I stood up, bringing her with me. Blouse undone, her
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| moonflwr8 |
Posted: 2008/2/6 10:55 Updated: 2008/2/6 10:55 |
Lusty Librarian's Pet   Joined: 2007/2/27 From: Posts: 164 |
 YEEEHAWWW Very good story. It was well writen and extremely entertaining. Oh I do love
those cowboys...giddiup! moon
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| edlyneham |
Posted: 2008/2/6 4:53 Updated: 2008/2/6 4:53 |
Up and Comer   Joined: 2006/1/12 From: Perth, Scotland Posts: 66 |
 Well done... ... hot and humourous. Clever trick! Thanks
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| sliceofheaven70 |
Posted: 2008/2/4 22:56 Updated: 2008/2/4 22:56 |
Flirt   Joined: 2007/2/2 From: Posts: 37 |
 Nice I thought it was cute...and hot!
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| bintarab |
Posted: 2008/2/4 16:21 Updated: 2008/2/4 16:21 |
Lusty Librarian's Pet   Joined: 2007/4/28 From: The state that considers same-sex marriage illegitimate. (!) Posts: 160 |
 Ride 'em, cowboy! I loved the narrator's voice here -- too bad his speech with Debbie was not nearly
as distinctive as his narrative voice was. It was very clinical -- "do this,"
"do that" -- and it's obvious from the rest of your piece that you're capable
of writing more than that. I love the last line of your story; it encapsulates
much of the narrator's no-nonsense attitude as well as his personality. There
was one spot where you had a little POV slip, but otherwise you kept faithful
to the narrator's point of view. Your writing is smooth, but this piece could
be better paced to make the narrator's interaction with Debbie as rich as the
set-up was. All in all, this was an enjoyable story. Thanks for submitting it!
~bint
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